Xmas in April

After weeks of research I am going to Yongsan tomorrow morning to pick up a laptop and a digital camera. (and an Xbox) -ed
I can barely contain my excitement - after proving that four months of computer abstinence drastically improved my life and lifestyle, I am once again ready to poison the future with a virtual tech cokefest. Laissez les bons temps gaspiller!
The good news is that this blog's quality of writing (in terms of comprehensibility) should improve since I won't have to compose every fortnight's thoughts into a five minute varorium.

A most enjoyable email correspondence continues with Mlle Burnt Toast (A) over the last few days and she stayed true to her unselfish roots by sending a superb care package to the school. It included a variety of literary works pertinent to our age and culture - Harper's, the Weekly World News, Xclaim Music review and the like. There was also a new sony discman (!) that works wonderfully and came with a complement of home-burnt NEW music! Let me say - well done Mlle A! You know that musical nostalgia is a tempting but dangerous stagnation - the only good music is made by kids.

The one drawback to my new toy is that it came with insane cybernetic earplugs that are supposed to fit snugly around the contours of one's ears to provide an undisturbed concert even while, say, jogging or performing boudoir acrobatics. However my elfin features present such an absurd ergonomic challenge to any equipment manufacturer that I almost prefer unadorned earbuds. The clips pinch where they should not, and they flex away from my gigantic nordic melon at times so that the only way to hear the music is to crank it, which I should be doing anyway I suppose.

I have listened to the Killers - Hot Fuss on repeat for a week, and I have to say this new album is pretty good, yet it is paradoxically imitative of old, 80s and 90s britpop. There is wayyy too much ripping-off of the Strokes, but if you like the Strokes, and who doesn't, then this is really an enjoyable companion piece, and only an annoyingly rabid fan would chafe at having twice as much of one type of music making the rounds. As Johnny Loftus describes it -"[this is] lifestyle music for sheltered bloggers and female professionals who still wear cool hairstyles." I guess that would describe me to a Long Island Iced 'T'.

This weekend I went to visit a colleague, Stevie Woods (Tiger) at Soon Cheon Hyang hospital. He is deathly ill with pneumonia and has not told his family (upright southern black baptists) for fear of worrying them something fierce. He is noble if pious, and sings a good Brian McKnight at the noraebang, so I brought him a copy of Innvervisions and loaned him the Calcan 0.9 (the Discman - Ange - you know I only just now got the joke there :p) until he gets better. I think it is somehow so cosmically, karmically perfect that the good influences of GM, A and my own maudlin sentimentality will (hopefully) bring a smile to someone they don't know. So, the music reviews will be delayed for a while - but for a good cause.

Later that night

I wouldn't get used to this torrid posting pace, but I'm at the PC bang tonight because I went out for galbi and drinks with some colleagues, and I agreed to have a drink with Slim Delacroix (SD) mostly because he is funny as hell and cool, and he usually doesn't let me hang out with him. We were having a gay old time (in the archaic sense of the word) talking about art and travelling and girls when my cell phone buzzed. It was long distance. It was a guy speaking perfect English and asking for me by both names. I was terrified. Have they found me?? I stammered "wrong number" and hung up.

SD sprung for most of the bill, which shocked me since I thought he was a chiseller, and wouldn't take any money despite my treble protest. I put my things in the apt. and immediately hoofed it over here where I've been researching the phone number, writing this monstrosity and waiting for Gandhi McRae (GM) to write back. It was either him or my parents who gave out the number, and I need to nip this in the bud if it's nipping that's needed. By aye!

PS - I am typing this at twenty after 5 in the morning behind 3 immaculately coiffed young women playing KartRider for their kicks after boozing on a Saturday night. Think about that. Korean lessons time!

Whinging Already

Today was starting off so well. I worked out in the morning and I was on time for the K-grans class but then I took the wrong train leaving Soehyeon station. That is the first time I've ever done that leaving Dead Language, the illicit hogwon #2 (heretofore known as DL). It always seemed to work out that when I'm leaving DL I'm heading in the right direction to catch the train going back to Daechi (where I live) when I go down a particular staircase. I'm still mystified how I got reversed- let me tell you how it happened - you are Mr. Magoo made flesh! -ed) By the time I noticed my error (why are we above ground?!?) I was at the end of the line, and had to wait for the train to reverse, and to really rub it in, I got stuck between some sort of postal worker brigade (or ?) that insisted on dominating the entire subway car; I presume for the sake of worker solidarity. They grinned pleasantly in totalitarian coordination as they pushed me to the edge, and eventually off, the seats. I called Polish Annie McBeal (PA) to punch me in. She agreed to do it, surprisingly, but naturally, girls are useless at cloak and dagger type stuff like that.

So I was twenty minutes late for school. When I got outside I figured I was already beyond salvation, and either PA had succeeded in her mission or I would be just as hung for 20 minutes as 30, so I stopped at the street vendor to get lunch. The closest guy was closed. I guess he was on a lunch break, at lunch time, the busiest time of his street vending day, which seems like the worst sort of mismanagement, in retrospect.

The next guy hadn't yet got his chicken skewers going, so the only thing left was some sort of deep fried tempura-like fare. I'd always avoided this stuff, since it seems like the demesne of emaciated schoolchildren, and I also had no idea what was in it. Korea adventure time! I bought six of each kind, for 2k and walked up the eight floors of stairs so that I could hang my coat on the doorknob, put my bag on the floor, and my running shoes behind that. Walking nonchalantly through the side entrance I presented the perfect picture of a worker who had simply escaped the notice of the staff at the front desk.

I walked confidently up to PA and asked if she had done me the favour. Of course not.

I didn't even bother to punch in at this point.
What incriminates more - a blank spot on your record or a black mark? Future essay topic!

PA then began to tell me there had been a surprise meeting to talk about some insignificant piece of administravia and the Head Honcho (HH) and the entire counter staff had been there to witness (or rather not) my absence. Unbelievable! I have been late 3 times since I started in January (you know that's miraculous for me) and all 3 of those times coincided with HH's visits. What are the odds? All of these tardies are the result of subway inexperience, not slacking. In fact, they are actually the result of working too much.

Want to know what was in the tempura? Rice and nothing. The shrimp-shaped pockets are actually empty, and the black tubes are filled with plain rice. I rarely do this, but I threw the whole thing out. I had to slink back to the audience of my pathetic not-actually-on-time-pantomime and use the phone (restaurants don't usually deliver to cells) to order a real lunch (which I can almost do in Korean by myself now).

Then I had to go back and sneak my coat, bag and shoes into my classroom.

PA came to my class and broke down and cried about how she doesn't know why she's here, she's isolated, she can't trust me or anyone, etc. This is the 3rd time we've talked about this. I feel bad for her, but I can't fix it, and maybe she is right to move to another campus. As long as she is here though, I think we can both be supportive, caring (careful) and generally make the best out of a bad decision. If I had full time work in Bundang I guess I would go first. Anyway, I just hate being the worst employee, and feeling persecuted and undesirable. bleah!

I hope you're getting a wicked tan sports fans.

My blog

Like it's audience, this blog will have to grow from humble beginnings.

Like Rome, until one day it is overwhelmed by it's own greatness.

I might put some pictures of things I see in Seoul when I get a camera. I might also write my first novel - "Bannerman" in this space.

Enjoy, Sybarites!